Being away from India for a while has been interesting. This time, I’ve started noticing how living in India has moulded and shaped me. On previous occasions when I came home to Australia, I was keen to experience what was “normality” to me. However, “normality” doesn’t exactly feel normal anymore.
I’ve changed!
In particular, I often feel like telling people to relax and loosen up. This shocks me. I used to be a meticulously organised person. One of those “control freaks”. I didn’t deal at all well with India’s “sab chalta hai” (anything goes) attitude.
An interesting email from one of my Indian readers helped me discover why. One of his observations about the West was that people always need to be “switched on”. Western society is transaction based, and one’s worth is measured according to convenience and entertainment value to others.
No wonder I felt like I constantly had to present my “best self” to people.
In India, I found this very difficult to do, especially with people often knocking on the door uninvited and unannounced. It caused me a great deal of anxiety. Horror of horrors if someone saw me wearing my maxi nightie, undressed and without makeup! I wasn’t looking my “best”. What ever would they think of me?!
But, as I visited more homes in India, I started realising something. It was common for women to remain in their maxis all day, even if they were expecting visitors. They didn’t feel the need to superficially impress others at all! It didn’t matter if they were busy doing something. Everyone pleasantly adjusted.
While, I’m really enjoying the space and fresh air in Australia. Even after five weeks here, life doesn’t quite feel normal. It does feel like something is missing — the spontaneity and warmth of India!
It’s good that I feel this way though. I think I’ve finally reached the point where I can appreciate both cultures, rather than trying to recapture my own.
Related Posts:
- Goa is Not a Good Place for Indian-Foreigner Couples
- Back to Australia Again
- My Bad Indian Habits
- My “Normal” Lunch at Out of the Blue
- How Much Does House Size Matter?
- My Stay With My Inlaws
- A New Piece of Furniture: The Sofa Cum Bed
- Finally Finding My Feet in Mumbai?
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I have read a few of your other posts and as a Indian man living abroad and married to a non-Indian, I’ve been trying to find that one post that really spoke to me. I think the last sentence in this post hit the nail on the head, that is exactly where I am at right now. I can truly honestly appreciate both cultures/people equally without any judgments.
Why haven’t I run into your blog before? Truly exceptional.
Thank you so much. I’m honoured.
It’s an amazing thing when another culture starts becoming familiar to you, and your world expands. At the end of the day, no matter where we live and how we act, we’re all people. 
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