Tailor made kurti -- the desi touch.
It’s taken me years, but I’ve finally ventured another step closer to being Indian. I’ve had some clothes stitched by a tailor.
Now that I’ve done it, I wonder why I’ve wasted so much time and money buying ready-made clothes that don’t fit me! It’s the curse of my foreign heritage I guess. Back home, only the really rich can afford to get their clothes tailor-made. It’s kind of like having a maid! Plus, I considered it to be all too much hassle.
However, seeing some beautiful and inexpensive salwaar kameez dress fabric convinced me to take the plunge. Then, my sister in law gave me some more fabric to make simple kurtis (tops).
Since I didn’t know where the tailor was in this new neighbourhood, my friend’s mum took me there — to a small shop near Hiranandani Hospital.
I’m so glad she accompanied me, because as expected, I got horribly confused. So many designs to choose from! It wasn’t just a simple matter of having my measurements taken. I was presented with two books full of pictures of different cuts, necklines, backs, and lengths. And sleeves or no sleeves? Soon, everyone was as confused as I was. It was obviously going to take me a while to make any decisions, so my friend’s mother left me with the tailor and went to have her upper lip threaded.
Finally, I settled on two salwaar kameez designs with short sleeves, one with a V-neck and one with a square neck. One kurti with short sleeves and a V-neck, and one without sleeves and a diagonal neck.
The stitching cost came to 1,000 rupees (350 rupees for each salwaar kameez, with lining) and 150 for each kurti. I picked the clothes up three days later, and wow, they fitted me so well! Now, I have another new project to overhaul my wardrobe.
Here’s me wearing one of the simple kurtis and jeans — dressed up with a few desi accessories (bindi, nose ring, Bengali style gold earrings, and mangal sutra)! Unfortunately, I didn’t think about wearing my red glass bangles until later.
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@ Sharrell’s Celebrity Doppleganger , “…there is only a small 1% difference between 6 and 7%…”
Exactly, a small difference, not a huge one!!! So Indian females (at least in the west) are fairly liberated compared to their male counterparts!!!
You are right, to an extent. However, ‘comfort zone’ is more about ethnicity and cultural compatibility, rather than looks. For instance most Cambodians marry Cambodians even though, going by looks, they could be marrying Laotians, Thais or Burmese as well.
True, but between white and black people, or white and brown (desi), or brown and black, …. there’s usually a bigger difference in looks, and other stuff too.
@ Sharrell’s Celebrity Doppleganger:
Yes. Still, people have less hangups to dating outside their looks than compatibility (of which ethnicity and culture plays an important part). Sharell’s case would be a good example.
I’m confused. What’s my case a good example of?
True, African-Americans are much more likely to date any American women, compare to their FOB African counterparts. This is more related to the ‘cultural compatibility’, less to the African looks or cigar-size!!!
Sharell, you example is a good example of a good example of good compatibility or a good example of good looks….does it help?
In your case, you had less problems dating some one outside you own ‘looks range’!!! On the other hand, if your hubby were ‘tall-fair-skinned’ (more close to your own looks), but much more traditional Indian, you would certainly have more problems dating him. So ‘looks’ is less important than ‘cultural compatibility’. And yours is the prime example!!!
Ah, I see. And yes, cultural compatibility is extremely important. If my husband was traditional Indian, I can guarantee that we wouldn’t be together, no matter how good looking he was! I don’t mind respecting Indian tradition when necessary, I just couldn’t live like that in daily life. I’m talking about the rituals, the way women are expected to behave, and so on.
Um, in urban India, the way women are expected to behave is very similar, if you minus ‘western feminism/equality’ and add ‘a more moral/religious approach’. I would like to know if you have experienced something uniquely new that falls outside the ‘western feminism/equality’ as well as ‘a more moral/religious approach’. This would give us something truly ‘Indian traditional’!!! (I know so many things like that…).
Trying to understand that question has hurt my brain!
Can you please explain it more, perhaps with an example.
I’m not feminist but equality is very important for me, as is a more relaxed view of morality and religion.
I knew it was a tricky one, even I scratched my head for a second after writing the question down to make sure I have a clear idea about it.
There are many things in India and the west that don’t exactly fall in feminist/equality ideas or religious ideas. I call such characteristics as ‘true traditions’, such traditions could even be the ‘old-stereotypes’, but these are the ones that really separates different groups more than anything else does! A simplest example is, ‘elegance in women’, which in east and west is quite different. Some times such things overlap, but by and large, they are quite different and have least to do with moral-religion or feminism alike. Most western women are like bipolar patients – too hysterical (high) or too melancholic (low). Eastern women, in general, are mostly in between.
Another similar example – an old Indian stereotype about westerners that they are polished, and therefore, fake. Indians are generally rude, but have warmth in conversation. While westerners are generally nice, but cold and distant, especially western girls.
One can also blame the above characteristics as driven by cultural ideas or traditions, but that will force us to make a conclusion that every thing we do is driven by our own culture or religion, which in turn, will diminish something what we call ‘natural’ characteristics!!!
As Amit Desai put it. Your relationship is an example of how it is easier to jump a looks barrier rather than a cultural barrier.
On the other hand, the Indian culture appears superficial and fake from an outsider’s perspective. Most notably, the Indian disregard for individuality or its moral double standards.
And of course, the Anglo-Saxon society IS a bit superficial and fake. Especially the ‘be nice’ and ‘smile’ culture. It becomes very evident when the smile doesn’t match the facial expression or someone is nice to you when their body language clearly speaks of contempt or irritation.
Um, this is the reason I put somewhat contradictory words in one sentence. “Indians being rude, but warm”. For an outsider, a rude person may not be warm!!! Similarly, “westerners being nice, but distant”. If you are nice, how would you sound distant or cold to someone?
Hi, I’m enjoying reading your entries. I’m an American woman living and working in Hiranandani. I’d really like to find a good tailor. Could you give me more information on how to find the tailor that you liked near the hospital? Thanks.
Hi Suzanne, it’s really simple to find. Just head straight past the hospital (in the direction away from the main centre of Hiranandani). The road is wide in front of the hospital but it will narrow. Head along the narrow road a short distance and you’ll come to a strip of shops on your left. The tailor is in there. It’s a small store with clothing hanging up in it, near the start of the shopping strip. There’s a set of steps going down in front of it from the side of the road. Hope this helps!
thanks. shouldn’t be hard to find. will let you know how it goes
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