Wow, time flies so fast! From this, to this, to this… and now the photo above. He’ll be celebrating his third birthday this weekend. He seems so grown up already. He’s developed such a personality, is doing really well at preschool, and loves posing for photos.
School’s out, so my mother in law and older sister in law came over to our place last Sunday with the kids. We took them to the local park where I go walking, which also has a big children’s playground, and they LOVED it. As soon as we got through the gates, they took off running! Here are some happy snaps of us all. [click to continue…]
After recently writing about the one person’s heartening journey to starting a foster care organisation in India, today I’m heartbroken to learn of the ending of another friend’s work in running a shelter home for street children in Mumbai.
My friend Bernie, pictured in the photo above, used to be an investment banker on Wall Street in the US. She first came to India on a church mission trip, as part of a team focused on helping commercial sex workers (prostitutes) and children. During the trip, she met her Indian husband to be, who was their host in Mumbai. She returned to India on a second trip, where she worked worked exclusively in the red-light district of Pune. While on these trips, she felt it was her life purpose, God’s calling, to move to India permanently and help underprivileged women and children.
Her and her husband co-founded an organisation called Tender Hands, which rescues and rehabilitates street children and commercial sex workers from the streets of Mumbai. The children are cared for in shelter homes, where they’re given love, schooling, medical treatment, and the opportunity to thrive. (I previously mentioned Bernie and Tender Hands briefly in this blog post).
Today, I received an extremely sad email from Bernie, explaining that she was faced with no option but to shut down these shelter homes. The reason why? The government has introduced new regulations in response to negative publicity over bad shelter homes where child abuse was happening. [click to continue…]
Marriage isn’t always easy and all marriages have problems. Some, unfortunately, end in divorce when the problems are insurmountable. However, this recent newspaper article made me realise just how different the problems can be in Indian marriages compared to western marriages.
The focus of the article is the hearing of an appeal in the Bombay High Court of a man (aged 30) seeking a divorce from his wife (aged 26), which the Family Court had declined to grant him.
The couple in question were married just two weeks after their engagement. Only four months into their marriage, the husband decided that he wanted a divorce on grounds of cruelty. So what exactly were the cruel deeds that the wife had done to him?
According to the husband’s divorce application, the cruelty started on their honeymoon when the wife refused to have sex with him unless contraception was used. Apparently, she didn’t want to conceive until the couple had settled down.
Then, after the couple returned to their matrimonial home, the husband discovered that his wife couldn’t cook properly. His petition claimed that she was spoiling food and “served half-cooked and half boiled” food to his parents and sister. [click to continue…]
I often think about what shapes people’s lives. Whether we’re all on this earth for a unique purpose, and how our circumstances push us towards fulfilling that purpose.
As a result, I was really intrigued by the life story of one reader who recently wrote to me to tell me how much he liked my blog. He revealed a little about himself to me. Named Ian Anand Forber-Pratt, he was born in 1980 in Calcutta, but was later adopted by American parents who lived in Seattle. A year ago, he sold everything and moved to India permanently to start a foster care organisation in Udaipur. It’s called Foster Care India.
I had to know more, so asked him if I could interview him for my blog. Fortunately, he agreed. Here’s what he shared with me about his remarkable and inspiring journey so far.
What inspired you to come to India and set up your organisation?
The idea has been developing for years to start a foster care organization in India. The real planning started in 2006. In 2006, I returned to Kolkata to look for my biological family and was unable to find anyone. I now lead trips of adoptees who return to India and provide counseling support for the children. I have experience in therapeutic work with foster youth and adoptees.
After the ’06 Kolkata trip, I decided that it was my duty to help orphaned children in India in some way or another. [click to continue…]
When I came to India, racism was not really a term I was familiar with. Sure, I knew what it was. Yet, it had never had much bearing in my life. I had friends from different cultures, and treated everyone the same.
However, in the more than six years I’ve now been living in India, I’ve become so acquainted with it to the point that I’m sick of hearing it. It wouldn’t bother me so much if it was used correctly. However, I’ve been called racist simply because I come from Australia, or simply because I’ve made a negative observation about something in India (that even Indians would say themselves). The racism term is thrown around so loosely, it’s completely lost its meaning and puts me on edge every time I hear it.
And, let’s not to overlook the other side of racism — that is the racism I often face in India because I’m white! I’m viewed as being rich and I’m frequently quoted higher prices. It’s a constant battle not to be ripped off. In addition, thanks to the common perception that Indians have of white women being loose and immoral, I’m often leered at in the street and constantly receive emails from Indian guys propositioning me for sex.
Yes, this is racism according to the definition:
1. The belief that all members of each race possess characteristics or abilities specific to that race, esp. so as to distinguish it as inferior or superior to another race or races.
2. Prejudice or discrimination directed against someone of a different race based on such a belief.
However, this kind of racism isn’t taken seriously. A comment left by one reader (an American Indian) on my blog recently summed up why. [click to continue…]
Recently, I came across these groovy handmade anklets on Craftsvilla.com and couldn’t resist buying a couple, especially as they were on sale for only 175 rupees each. (Unfortunately, the special doesn’t seem to be happening anymore, but there are plenty more like them and in different colours).
Apart from the design, what I love about the anklets that they’re fully adjustable — which is very necessary for people with big bones such as myself. (I do apologise if you think my foot isn’t looking the best, but do you know how hard it is to take an attractive photo of your foot?).
For anyone not familiar with Craftsvilla, it’s an online shop that’s based in India and sells handicrafts from all over the country. And, they ship worldwide!
As with many of these innovative new businesses, I was really impressed by the personalised service. I received a handwritten note from the co-founder, thanking me for my purchase and for contributing to the growth of artisans in India, and a little thank you gift as well. It’s a tea light diya with natural wax and essential oils. It smells AMAZING!
Thank you card and gift, and one of my anklets wrapped up.
Note: For those who are wondering, I was just a regular customer and I paid for my purchase at Craftsvilla. I’ve written this post because I was very happy with what I bought and wanted to spread the word about this great new online business.
Oh yeah, and they do have moochwala coffee mugs! I’ll be going back for one of them for sure.
Oh my! The above TV commercial is currently showing in India. It promotes an intimate wash for the female private parts (ie. the vagina). Surely, a good thing right? After all, proper hygiene should be maintained down there.
Well, maybe not. The response has been less than positive. Actually, the commercial has prompted widespread outrage (you can read just some of it here, here, and here).
The reason why? It mentions that the intimate wash will bring “freshness and fairness” to the area, and brighten it. Uh oh. That dreaded word. Fairness. It’s common knowledge that India has a fairness obsession, and that manufacturers play on it by promoting fairness creams for the face. However, it seems they’ve gone one step too far this time.
No doubt this latest product will heighten women’s insecurities about their colour.
But what do men think of it? My husband’s response has left me quite baffled. I asked him to take a look at the commercial and share his reaction. “Yeah, I’ve seen that on TV a few times. India is becoming progressive, isn’t it?” he replied nonchalantly.
How many women will actually buy the product, I wonder.
I gave my business suits to charity, quit my accounting job in Melbourne, moved to Mumbai, married an Indian guy, became a white Indian housewife, and started writing. This blog is where I share my thoughts and experiences about my expat life. It covers nearly everything from insights to insanity, food, culture, travel, and lifestyle.
Want to know more about India and me? Read my book. or start here.
Mrs.sikharam { So cute when I lived in Hawaii we had tons of house lizards. I let 3 chameleons free range. I would get tons of... } – May 20, 7:38 AM
XXX { HMM . THEY LOOK MORE LIKE CROCODILES AND HAVING SNAKE EYES . SO PEOPLE HATE THIS KIND OF CREATURES , I.E GENERALIZED WITH OTHER WILD... } – May 08, 2:50 AM
ASG { Chipkalio me kya rakha hai. Wo be kabhi cute hoti hai. Cute to bacche hote hai. Ak hath me baby or dusre me chipkali le... } – May 07, 2:37 PM
Arunava { The residents deserved what they got....they are not the victims here but a party to the crime....they should not have bought the apartments in the... } – May 14, 9:11 PM
Padparadscha { @Tanya. These situations make me sad.:( } – May 07, 2:52 AM
Preeti SInha { Yeah, agree with mentioned comments.. People plz add some Indian stuffs i am in search of some good one for my collection!!! Thanks in advance } – May 09, 11:49 AM
Sharell शारेल { Yeah, I do agree with you Julia. That was the aim of it, to promote Indian items. Hopefully, people will add more Indian stuff! } – Apr 16, 10:39 PM
Julia { It reminds me of Pinterest. I agree with the other comment that said that the stuff is really western. As a western girl I was... } – Apr 16, 8:51 PM
Padparadscha { @Amit. A police instructor told me exactly this ; when you can go away, go away, don't even fight for your property. But when you... } – May 07, 2:58 AM
Amit Desai { Change comes with awareness. Change doesn't come with eye-for-an-eye attitude either. Confronting people back would be dangerous for a verbal aggression, which is just stupidity... } – May 06, 6:34 PM
melbourne desi { amit this is precisely the issue. Every time we walk away it just emboldens the bully. Change does not come by walking away. } – May 02, 8:08 AM
Tanya { Fantastic story! Thanks for sharing it. And your observations at the end are very apt. Happiness and a blessed life are not contingent on the... } – May 04, 2:04 PM
Arnab { Hi Sharell, I am a student from Odisha and avid reader of your blog. So have you ever visited the north eastern states of India.... } – Apr 28, 1:50 PM
Sharell शारेल { Hi Raina, yes thanks, all is well. I haven't been inspired to write much lately though unfortunately. The heat in Mumbai is making me lazy.... } – Apr 28, 12:42 PM
nufio { go to any village in india if you are comparing regional mindset. nobody gives a shit about whats going on anywhere else but everyone knows... } – Apr 19, 9:03 AM
Sandra { Haha what a nice invitation . I must say that I Saudi is definitely safer than India for women but I wouldnt call it the... } – Apr 06, 1:41 PM
nufio { Well I just want to point out that, arguing for reservation for women is not what womens rights activists should be doing. Also men and... } – Apr 19, 8:54 AM
umots { "The real problem here is the mindset of our society. Indian society teaches girls not to go to bars, nightclubs etc. But what it really... } – Apr 16, 11:19 AM
prithviraj33 { Please point out where this violence in the media is. Most Indian movies are very clean and sanitized. There are no beatings of women or... } – Apr 14, 2:56 AM
Manny { About 6 years ago, I almost bought a 5 year old 172SP for $120K But good sense prevailed. The Engine had about 2000hrs TBO. But... } – Apr 17, 7:03 AM
umots { "And the way he portrayed his lifestyle, (he owns a cessna!!!)it was no lesser than a KJO movie..." While this might be a hoax, an... } – Apr 16, 8:50 PM
Pay by Paypal and I will ship it to you from India, signed!
Cost: $15 + $10 Postage.
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What Readers Have Said:
"What makes her story special is the way she writes it. It’s a sensitive and nuanced depiction, which neither glorifies the good nor mocks the bad. In fact, any woman who has ever relocated to another country can see a reflection of herself in Sharell’s stories."
"What I loved about Sharell’s story is the balance between open-mindedness to experiencing the new and an introspective account that is realistic and shows her flaws. As a psychologist, I was drawn to her insightfulness and her growing sense of awareness and sense of self."
"Sharell tells it exactly like it happened, warts and all, and she does so in a way that illuminates the deeper truths behind her experiences – truths many of us will be able to relate to. In her honesty, Sharell transcends simply narrating her own experience and speaks to all of us."
"The book is centred around finding happiness, questioning societal norms and finding your passion – no matter how unachievable it seems. It shares that struggle and persistence are keys to success, that knowing yourself and what you are striving for are of utmost importance and that the universe is constantly presenting the opportunities that we need if we are ready to take them.The vivid imagery Sharell’s writing brings about is testament to her passion and her talent as a writer."
"Being Indian, I loved the description of India which I thought was very different from the very cliched manner in which most non-Indians portray India. I am amazed at Sharell’s will power and love for her husband and her very positive attitude to life. The book is a very well written, honest account of her experience and it teaches all of us one thing. Have the courage to go out of your comfort zone and have the courage to change your life to achieve what you want."
"From the very first line of the book, you are transported into the author's world. You feel as she feels, you hurt when she does, you wonder in amazement at new found beauty, go through the tensions that she faces and celebrate with her in each new accomplishment. Sharell's way of writing weaves a magical but refreshingly detailed and honest view of life and living in Incredible India. Through her, we experience the "Real" India and not the touristy version filled with air conditioned hotel rooms and 24/7 water and electricity."
"Great book from someone whose blog I have been following for several years. It is a waiting-to-happen gripping movie story, a self help book and a biography all rolled into one. I bought the book today and the writing was so gripping that I almost (had to break for lunch) finished it in one go."
"When she talks about her frustrations with India and its people there is also such insight there, and when you consider she is not Indian it gives you a bit of a head spin. Having visited India myself I found her descriptions hilarious but was amazed at how well she coped. The whole idea makes my mind boggle. I stayed up and read the whole book in one night - I had to know what happened at the end!"
when I lived in Hawaii we had tons of house lizards. I let 3 chameleons free range. I would get tons of... } – 
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