A while ago, I wrote about what goes on behind the scenes of a modern day arranged marriage in India. What was clear is that expectations are high and it can be difficult to find an appropriate match — especially so if you’re a well educated woman aged over 25.
These days, the trend is seeing more and more urban educated Indian females who are reaching their 30s and doing really well in their career, yet are still unmarried. Unfortunately, this means that the marriage market is dominated by women looking for men. What’s more, people are becoming distrustful of matrimonial websites because of the increasing number of disaster stories associated with them. Hence, it can be a real challenge to find decent potential spouses.
This is exactly what happened to the sister of a reader of my blog. As a doctor, you’d think she’d attract plenty of eligible bachelors. However, disappointingly, she wasn’t able to get a great match.
This prompted my reader to start a new matrimonial website solely for professionals aged over 25, called Matchmecupid.com. I thought it would be helpful to mention it here because funnily enough, I do get people writing to me asking for assistance in finding a spouse! [click to continue…]
With the sun starting to shine again in Mumbai, brightening my mood along with it, it’s time for my annual activity of decorating the terrace! Since we have an attractively tiled terrace in our new apartment, and I don’t have to paint the floor (no bright purple, or any other outrageous colour this year!), I’ve decided to turn my attention to creating a relaxing corner to meditate in.
A couple of weekends ago, my husband and I went to one of those huge Indian handicraft fairs (popularly known as the “exhibition cum sale”) that are often at Bandra Reclamation. I saw this beautiful hand carved wooden statue of Goddess Saraswati (she stands around a metre tall) but was rather discouraged by the price quoted — 12,000 rupees!
Saraswati, Goddess of learning and creativity.
“Tell him we’ll give him 5,000 rupees,” I nudged my husband, not daring to think that the guy would be interested. But he was! After a call to his boss, he reluctantly agreed. And the beautiful Goddess was ours. [click to continue…]
When it comes to attracting attention and drawing the crowds during the Ganesh festival in Mumbai, there are a number of south Mumbai Ganesh mandals that like to “Lord” it over the others with imposing titles and idols. Amongst the most well known of them are the Mumbaicha Raja, Lalbaugcha Raja, and the Khetwadi Ganraj.
Admittedly, it can make us feel a bit left out in the suburbs (although there is the Andhericha Raja). Not any more though! The area where I live now has its own Raja this year — and he’s not just any ole raja. He’s a maharaja (great king)… the Hiranandanicha Maharaja!
Introducing for the first time... the Hiranandanicha Maharaja. (Funnily enough, note that he doesn't look like his picture!)
The 2012 Ganesh festival got underway a couple of days ago in India. As many people know, this is my favourite festival in Mumbai.
My apartment building complex is having an idol for the second year this year. Lord Ganesh will stay with us for five days, before going for immersion in Powai Lake. An aarti is held every morning and evening for him, and residents can attend and participate in the singing of bhajans (devotional songs).
I’ve uploaded a short video of last night’s aarti, for those who’d like to experience the beauty of it.
I’ve lost count of how many times people have asked me that question, both in shock and dismay, in India.
Yuck, why would I want to have oily hair? The reason why I wash it is so that it’s not oily!
However, oiling one’s hair is an important activity in India. It starts from a young age. My husband attributes the fact that he isn’t going grey or bald to his mother oiling his hair when he was a child.
I’ve never believed it and never felt inclined to oil my hair — that is, until this monsoon. My hair has grown quite long and has been wilder then ever in the humidity. In a bid to try and get it under control, I bought a bottle of Himalaya Revitalising Hair Oil. It contains bhringaraja and amalaki to promote hair growth, methi to nourish the hair with proteins, and neem and bilva to prevent scalp infections.
I’m sure I don’t use enough of it to get all these benefits, particularly as I don’t rub it into my scalp. However, if I put a little oil on the palm of my hand and run it through my hair, I’ve found that it really settles it down and helps it fall into tidier waves rather than a frizzy mop!
Of course, I’m left wondering why I didn’t start doing it sooner…
It’s not often that a reader of my blog gets in touch and offers to send me a copy of their debut book — so understandably I was quite excited when one reader, Mukul Kumar, did. I was even more interested because he’s a software engineer. It’s heartening when people who aren’t in a creative profession are able to successfully pursue their creative side. I must admit, I was also curious to find out about the life of a software engineer, particularly culture shock experiences abroad. (I once worked on a software implementation project in London, documenting financial systems, so software engineering isn’t totally unfamiliar to me).
The book, called Onsite Opportunity, is a novel that’s based on real life situations. I was pleased to discover that it’s been well written and edited, and hence is noticably free of common grammatical errors and peculiarities of Indian English. (Many books, published in English in India, aren’t). What’s more, the book is actually really entertaining and very easy to relate to if you’re familiar with Indian idiosyncrasies.
It documents the often hapless cross-cultural work experiences of starry-eyed software engineer Ganga and his eclectic bunch of Indian colleagues, making fun of both Indian and foreign mannerisms. The story is quick to get going, launching into tales of trysts with clients visiting India from South Korea. By the time I reached page 17, and it was time for the Indian software team to go to Seoul, I was already giggling. [click to continue…]
When it comes to rats in Mumbai, you can run but you can’t hide it seems. Regular readers will recall that one of the reasons why we shifted from our bungalow and back into an apartment was a persistent rat problem. We thought that moving to the 15th floor of a modern apartment complex would solve the problem, as we’d be able to get away from the rats. How very wrong we were!
After coming home from a movie tonight, not long after midnight I went out to the balcony. While I was sitting there, enjoying the view in the dark, I was interrupted by a horribly familiar swish of a tail. Even worse, it disappeared through one of the open sliding doors behind the sofa.
RAT!!!!!
My dutiful husband took up chase, and it ran back outside and down the open area where the drainage pipe is secured to the building. Ah yes, it makes sense now why I’d noticed that some neighbours on lower floors had theirs covered.
Alarmed, I headed to the balcony attached to the kitchen, which is where the washing machine is kept. There was another familiar swish, as a black body scurried away down the drainage opening there.
I gave my business suits to charity, quit my accounting job in Melbourne, moved to Mumbai, married an Indian guy, became a white Indian housewife, and started writing. This blog is where I share my thoughts and experiences about my expat life. It covers nearly everything from insights to insanity, food, culture, travel, and lifestyle.
Want to know more about India and me? Read my book. or start here.
Arunava { The residents deserved what they got....they are not the victims here but a party to the crime....they should not have bought the apartments in the... } – May 14, 9:11 PM
Padparadscha { @Tanya. These situations make me sad.:( } – May 07, 2:52 AM
Preeti SInha { Yeah, agree with mentioned comments.. People plz add some Indian stuffs i am in search of some good one for my collection!!! Thanks in advance } – May 09, 11:49 AM
Sharell शारेल { Yeah, I do agree with you Julia. That was the aim of it, to promote Indian items. Hopefully, people will add more Indian stuff! } – Apr 16, 10:39 PM
Julia { It reminds me of Pinterest. I agree with the other comment that said that the stuff is really western. As a western girl I was... } – Apr 16, 8:51 PM
XXX { HMM . THEY LOOK MORE LIKE CROCODILES AND HAVING SNAKE EYES . SO PEOPLE HATE THIS KIND OF CREATURES , I.E GENERALIZED WITH OTHER WILD... } – May 08, 2:50 AM
ASG { Chipkalio me kya rakha hai. Wo be kabhi cute hoti hai. Cute to bacche hote hai. Ak hath me baby or dusre me chipkali le... } – May 07, 2:37 PM
Sharell शारेल { That's understandable. Coming from a good family is important in India! } – May 07, 11:56 AM
Padparadscha { @Amit. A police instructor told me exactly this ; when you can go away, go away, don't even fight for your property. But when you... } – May 07, 2:58 AM
Amit Desai { Change comes with awareness. Change doesn't come with eye-for-an-eye attitude either. Confronting people back would be dangerous for a verbal aggression, which is just stupidity... } – May 06, 6:34 PM
melbourne desi { amit this is precisely the issue. Every time we walk away it just emboldens the bully. Change does not come by walking away. } – May 02, 8:08 AM
Tanya { Fantastic story! Thanks for sharing it. And your observations at the end are very apt. Happiness and a blessed life are not contingent on the... } – May 04, 2:04 PM
Arnab { Hi Sharell, I am a student from Odisha and avid reader of your blog. So have you ever visited the north eastern states of India.... } – Apr 28, 1:50 PM
Sharell शारेल { Hi Raina, yes thanks, all is well. I haven't been inspired to write much lately though unfortunately. The heat in Mumbai is making me lazy.... } – Apr 28, 12:42 PM
nufio { go to any village in india if you are comparing regional mindset. nobody gives a shit about whats going on anywhere else but everyone knows... } – Apr 19, 9:03 AM
Sandra { Haha what a nice invitation . I must say that I Saudi is definitely safer than India for women but I wouldnt call it the... } – Apr 06, 1:41 PM
nufio { Well I just want to point out that, arguing for reservation for women is not what womens rights activists should be doing. Also men and... } – Apr 19, 8:54 AM
umots { "The real problem here is the mindset of our society. Indian society teaches girls not to go to bars, nightclubs etc. But what it really... } – Apr 16, 11:19 AM
prithviraj33 { Please point out where this violence in the media is. Most Indian movies are very clean and sanitized. There are no beatings of women or... } – Apr 14, 2:56 AM
Manny { About 6 years ago, I almost bought a 5 year old 172SP for $120K But good sense prevailed. The Engine had about 2000hrs TBO. But... } – Apr 17, 7:03 AM
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"What makes her story special is the way she writes it. It’s a sensitive and nuanced depiction, which neither glorifies the good nor mocks the bad. In fact, any woman who has ever relocated to another country can see a reflection of herself in Sharell’s stories."
"What I loved about Sharell’s story is the balance between open-mindedness to experiencing the new and an introspective account that is realistic and shows her flaws. As a psychologist, I was drawn to her insightfulness and her growing sense of awareness and sense of self."
"Sharell tells it exactly like it happened, warts and all, and she does so in a way that illuminates the deeper truths behind her experiences – truths many of us will be able to relate to. In her honesty, Sharell transcends simply narrating her own experience and speaks to all of us."
"The book is centred around finding happiness, questioning societal norms and finding your passion – no matter how unachievable it seems. It shares that struggle and persistence are keys to success, that knowing yourself and what you are striving for are of utmost importance and that the universe is constantly presenting the opportunities that we need if we are ready to take them.The vivid imagery Sharell’s writing brings about is testament to her passion and her talent as a writer."
"Being Indian, I loved the description of India which I thought was very different from the very cliched manner in which most non-Indians portray India. I am amazed at Sharell’s will power and love for her husband and her very positive attitude to life. The book is a very well written, honest account of her experience and it teaches all of us one thing. Have the courage to go out of your comfort zone and have the courage to change your life to achieve what you want."
"From the very first line of the book, you are transported into the author's world. You feel as she feels, you hurt when she does, you wonder in amazement at new found beauty, go through the tensions that she faces and celebrate with her in each new accomplishment. Sharell's way of writing weaves a magical but refreshingly detailed and honest view of life and living in Incredible India. Through her, we experience the "Real" India and not the touristy version filled with air conditioned hotel rooms and 24/7 water and electricity."
"Great book from someone whose blog I have been following for several years. It is a waiting-to-happen gripping movie story, a self help book and a biography all rolled into one. I bought the book today and the writing was so gripping that I almost (had to break for lunch) finished it in one go."
"When she talks about her frustrations with India and its people there is also such insight there, and when you consider she is not Indian it gives you a bit of a head spin. Having visited India myself I found her descriptions hilarious but was amazed at how well she coped. The whole idea makes my mind boggle. I stayed up and read the whole book in one night - I had to know what happened at the end!"
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. I must say that I Saudi is definitely safer than India for women but I wouldnt call it the... } – 
